Tuesday, March 13, 2012

The Bachelor Season Finale: LIVE Recap!


It's all come down to this.

After months of speculation over The Bachelor spoilers and controversy swirling around a woman who has left an indelible mark on the show (for better or for worse), Courtney Robertson squares off with Lindzi Cox for the final rose.

Who will Ben Flajnik give it to?

Ben Flajnik Finale Pic

The next three hours will reveal all as the two ladies go on their last dates with Ben in Switzerland and he makes the proposal that brings this season to an end.

After he does, the After the Final Rose special will catch us up on Ben and his fiancee's current status. We'll be here throughout with THG's LIVE +/- recap:

Chris: It's the most controversial finale IN BACHELOR HISTORY (this year)! Plus 11.

Swiss Alps: So beautiful. And a Fitting venue for the Ice Queen's coronation. Plus 9.

Does ABC freaking have David Gray on retainer? Minus 13.

The MOUNTAIN gives Ben hope?! Uggggh. Minus 7.

Ben's sister looks a little Shawntel Newton-esque. Plus 4.

Red flag? Understatement of all time. Minus 8.

Lindzi looks as cute as she has all season. Things certainly haven't gone downhill since she rode in on a horse ... dinnertime silverware faux pas aside. Plus 12.

Lindzi and Julia are talking smack about Courtney? We're not even 15 minutes into the episode! Minus 8 for rehashing the obviously coached ABC narrative.

"Red Flag" and "modeling" drinking game, anyone? Plus 6.

WHAT is Ben wearing, a shirt made of alpaca fur? Minus 5.

Courtney, in nasally baby voice: "You like me? You like me?! Aww." Shoot us now. After we take two shots for the modeling and red flag references. Minus 9.

The creepy Courtney soundtrack definitely isn't designed to foster the psycopath image ABC has created for her. Not at all. Nice work, sound guys. Plus 8.

Julia "will never truly know went on this season" ... until she watches it unfold on network TV and becomes sick to her stomach every single week. Minus 7.

Wait, Court won her "Barb" and "Jule"? Did we see different footage? Minus only 2, 'cause she did handle the questions well, but she's not that pretty or charming.

Ben F. in Switzerland

The Flajnik family's take: Lindzi is a "lovely" person. Courtney is "honest," has "depth" and there is "more of what [Ben] wants." Advantage: Court. Minus 20.

For some reason Ben annoys us when he says things. Like "Zermatt." Or "these women." Or "mountain caps." Or anything, if we're being honest. Minus 12.

Oye, Lindzi's roots are looking kinda rough. Still hope she wins, so Plus 1.

Lindzi can totally trust Ben "on the slopes and in life." GROAN. Minus 19.

Promotional consideration furnished by: Zermatt Tourism! Ya think? Also sponsored by models, red flags and wool! And in about 45 minutes, Neil Lane! Plus 6.

Even when Lindzi's annoying, she's so darn lovable. Plus 7.

Still, this feels more like fun banter than romantic courtship. At this point she may need to pull a Tonya Harding on Courtney to have any chance. Here's hoping! Plus 30.

Ben keeps saying he "needs more time" since things have been "moving more slowly" with Lindzi. Just because some girls don't hijack one-on-one time or strip buck ass naked on a group date doesn't mean they've failed somehow. Minus 12.

Mmmyeah Lindz is acting kinda drunk up in herrrrre. Plus 18.

Lindzi: [breathy voice] "I love you ..." Ben: [nods, silent]. Minus 45. This guy makes Brad Womack look charismatic ... he can't even fake it at this point.

OMFG they're in a helicopter!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Minus 13.

"New heights"? Are you guys kidding?! Minus 17.

Someone's got to spoof her exulting "I got the stamp of approval" and doing lame baby talk as a sequel to this video of Courtney auto-tuned (below). Plus 9.

It's "kiss the cook," not the "chef," you morons. Minus 10.

People "keep taking and taking and don't give anything back" to Courtney? She's the one who goes skinny-dipping and bikini-less on the third date. Minus 12.

Courtney's "very special gift" to Ben somehow wasn't herself naked! Plus 15.

ABC's interns did a really a mediocre job on that scrapbook. Minus 18.

And also on styling Ben. Suspenders? A vest? AND the hair? Minus 9.

What a surprise, Ben may be "second guessing" his decision now. He can't even sell stuff straight out of the Bachelor textbook. Which we would totally buy. Plus 5.

OOH, look at the artistic, blurry retrospective montage! Plus 4.

This is cheesy even by Bachelor standards. "I know what true love is" in this "fairy tale romance"? Honestly? Just put the cue cards away, it'll sound more natural. Minus 7.

Ongoing THG poll time:

Who should Ben pick?

Source: http://www.thehollywoodgossip.com/2012/03/the-bachelor-season-finale-live-recap/

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